What to do with giant, ugly desk my husband loves
My husband bought us a Rustic Mexican-made desk a number of years ago that he loves. The words "rustic" and "ergonomic" rarely go together and this desk is no exception.
Fully 6 feet long and almost 4 feet deep, it is a monolithic monstrosity. The drawers are not on slides so they tip downwards when you open them. They are just large empty holes so things just have to sit in there. I have drawer organizers to put in them, but I am developing the opinion that drawer organizers in a home office can actually defeat organization. This post isn't about the evolution of my home organization philosophy so I'll just leave it at that.
The back is completely enclosed so I would have to drill holes in the top and back if I wanted to discreetly run cables and cords to outlets. The thing is impossible to move, so if the outlet is behind any part of it, you end up with a giant surge protector ON the desk to facilitate plugging and unplugging cords. Plus I just unconditionally and irrationally hate it as a computer desk.
Dogs have chewed the bottom corners and the whole thing is finished with a dark oil-type rub so it's a weird gray-tan-greenish, old motor oil color. It looks dirty all the time.
The boards that make up the top were not joined properly (giving it even more of a RUSTIC appearance), so the putty has fallen out and there are 1/8 inch gaps between them. They're also not completely even so you can't write on it unless you move your paper all the way over to the side. I tried to use it as a craft table, but it's too low to stand at and the gaps have eaten any number of beads, paper embellishments, sequins and pins.
I was hoping it would be too big to move out of our old house (we remodeled the kitchen after we moved it into the back office) but no such luck. So we are preparing to move into a new house and I fear I am going to be forced to put this beast into my new office, which I was hoping to fill with light and brightness. This desk, I am sure, will suck the life and joy out of any room I put it in.
The photo I'm attaching is as close as I could find - ours is in the storage unit. Imagine a similar desk with no fancy rope trim, several shades darker, and an aura of grey, moribund depression hanging over the whole thing.
Any ideas about what I can do with this thing? My husband thinks it's awesome, but probably wouldn't be adverse to me "fixing it up" a little.
Fully 6 feet long and almost 4 feet deep, it is a monolithic monstrosity. The drawers are not on slides so they tip downwards when you open them. They are just large empty holes so things just have to sit in there. I have drawer organizers to put in them, but I am developing the opinion that drawer organizers in a home office can actually defeat organization. This post isn't about the evolution of my home organization philosophy so I'll just leave it at that.
The back is completely enclosed so I would have to drill holes in the top and back if I wanted to discreetly run cables and cords to outlets. The thing is impossible to move, so if the outlet is behind any part of it, you end up with a giant surge protector ON the desk to facilitate plugging and unplugging cords. Plus I just unconditionally and irrationally hate it as a computer desk.
Dogs have chewed the bottom corners and the whole thing is finished with a dark oil-type rub so it's a weird gray-tan-greenish, old motor oil color. It looks dirty all the time.
The boards that make up the top were not joined properly (giving it even more of a RUSTIC appearance), so the putty has fallen out and there are 1/8 inch gaps between them. They're also not completely even so you can't write on it unless you move your paper all the way over to the side. I tried to use it as a craft table, but it's too low to stand at and the gaps have eaten any number of beads, paper embellishments, sequins and pins.
I was hoping it would be too big to move out of our old house (we remodeled the kitchen after we moved it into the back office) but no such luck. So we are preparing to move into a new house and I fear I am going to be forced to put this beast into my new office, which I was hoping to fill with light and brightness. This desk, I am sure, will suck the life and joy out of any room I put it in.
The photo I'm attaching is as close as I could find - ours is in the storage unit. Imagine a similar desk with no fancy rope trim, several shades darker, and an aura of grey, moribund depression hanging over the whole thing.
Any ideas about what I can do with this thing? My husband thinks it's awesome, but probably wouldn't be adverse to me "fixing it up" a little.

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Maybe it would help to make your husband work exclusively at this desk for a time. For instance, if you usually pay household bills and work on taxes, have him do it solo - at this desk - for the next 3 months. No fair escaping to dining table. Kindly but firmly lead him back to the desk. Then I think you will have an easier time guiding him to the right shared decision.
You might have an easier time getting rid of this, if you help him choose a new piece (maybe end table or console where the rusticity is less of a practical problem) in this rustic style so he can enjoy the style.
1. Is there something your husband really wants and you don't--something that you don't want slightly less than you don't want this desk? An expensive fly fishing vacation? Learning to play a sport he likes? Letting him pick the next car? Offer a trade--the desk gets replaced in exchange for your concession on another issue he knows you usually would oppose.
2. Buy your husband a beautiful, expensive new desk--something in a style he will really like, but not this dysfunctional rustic mess of a desk you have now. Surprise him for a birthday, Christmas or anniversary by getting rid of the old desk and installing the new one without his knowledge. He'll be too polite to tell you that he misses his old desk because it would seem like he was ungrateful for your generous surprise gift.
I think you need to backhand someone to accidentally drop it during the move (from a 5th storey building). But if you are unable to get rid of it or break it - what can you do that will keep your husband happy and you not breathing in a paper bag everytime you see it!!?
So putting on the thinking hat:
1) If you could fix it up a bit - you could have a tragic accident with paint/saw/drilling while you were fixing it up and then it would have to be torn apart
2) If not do it up so badly that he won't want it.
3) If he see through that - then does it have to go in your office? If not, could it go outside like a potting shed table and you could let the elements have their way with it and cover it with tons of potted plants - preferably ones that trail over the front?
Hmmm I can't think out of the box much more....
All the best and let us know what happens - this is one of the most entertaining dilemmas for today, although very sorry for your predicament
Can it be stripped down to its natural state and then you could do a wash on it or leave it natural and re putty the cracks failing that you can prime and paint it any colour you want
Consider a glass top which will protect the top and make it more functional
Consider new drawer glides on the drawers. I just put new full extension soft close glides in the kitchen for about 3.50 a set
Consider having a flip down front on the centre drawer and use it for your keyboard or laptop
Drill a hole in the top and use grommets to finish any holes so you can run your wires and mount your power bar on the underside
Hope these suggestions help
Good luck!
ASVInteriors, I think you've hit on something - the house we're buying has a huge detached workshop/garage that we intend to use for my husband's reloading and gunsmith-stuff space. Your suggestion #3 is right on the money and saves my marriage in the process - I can put this out in HIS work area and he can gaze upon it's rustic awfulness to his heart's content!
I'll even slap a coat of protective something-or-other on it, although it will get covered in Hoppe's and barrel oil soon enough. Brilliant!!!
However, I think I'm going with "giving it to the hubby to use as HIS desk in a place where I don't have to look at it" plan. That's probably a cop-out, I admit, but I think at this point I could buy a nice, light computer/office desk for less that it would cost (time and money) to retrofit this thing. Plus I'm not a patient craftsperson so I'm pretty sure I'd really screw it up in the process - thus putting into action ASVInteriors plan for me to do a bad job on the refinish so I'd have an excuse to ditch it!
Having said that, we have made custom "computer desks" for years. Rustic and functional can work together. It's just not mass marketable or "in" at this particular point in time so you won't find one at your local store. What is perhaps more challenging is the juxtaposition of high tech looking monitors, telephone equipment, faxes, printers and cpu's onto or into a rustic looking desk that is supposed to look like it came at a time when the telegraph was first invented. But, it can be done. :)
But..... are you SURE the Seller won't part with that gorgeous Super Bee, tho????
opposite-sounding results can sometimes be achieved with just the right amount of creativity.
Now I just have to Jedi-mind-trick my husband into believing this is the right place for HIS desk!! :-)