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What You Can Do to Help

Almost all of us have seen the desolation caused by Sandy. In the U.S. alone: more than 110 dead, millions without power, thousands homeless, neighborhoods wiped out and entire towns ravaged. This is when those of us from a distance can step up, reach out and be extended community, but it can be daunting to know what to do or where to start.

Perhaps you have friends who lost their home or belongings in Hurricane Sandy and you want to help. I have a few recommendations.
by Federal Emergency Management Agency
Think before you speak. Less is truly more when it comes to words. Beyond “I’m so sorry” there isn’t a lot to say. It feels inadequate, and that’s OK. Odds are, your friends aren’t philosophizing, but if they are trying to put their loss in perspective, simply listen. It’s one thing for the people who have lost all their worldly goods to say, “It’s just stuff,” and another thing altogether for you to say it, from your warm and intact home surrounded by all your stuff.

Listen. Whatever your friends have been through or lost, they have a story to tell. My friend Sue went down to serve in New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina. Her group distributed food, clothes and other basics. She asked everyone who came through the line, “What’s your story?” Every single person stopped to tell her and seemed more eager to talk than to eat.

Look for a practical need and fulfill it. Don’t say, "Let me know if there is any way I can help." People in crisis often don’t know what they need, and if they do, may still be reluctant to ask for help. This is often said to end a conversation, but resist the urge. If you truly want to be helpful, figure out what needs to be done and do it.
by Federal Emergency Management Agency
Send money. Writing a check to friends and family may seem impersonal, but it's one of the most helpful things you can do. Disasters are expensive. Something most of us don’t consider is the prohibitive expense of flood insurance. Many people who lost their homes and businesses were not fully insured. Even in the best cases, there are seemingly endless out-of-pocket expenses.

Help with the logistics. Some of us curl up in the fetal position at the thought of insurance forms. If you are an “i” dotter and a “t” crosser, consider giving your time to help a friend fill out and file paperwork.
by American Red Cross
Organize a picture drive. When our house burned down, what I mourned most deeply was the loss of all of our pictures and videos. Friends and family sorted through their pictures and began to send them. It was great to have so many replaced and to look through them together.

Open your home. This is one of the most profoundly helpful and compassionate things you can do. Losing your home and all your possessions is a surreal experience, and rebuilding is a long and arduous process. When an entire area is devastated, the rebuilding process is even slower. Even if it’s only for the short term, sharing your home is an extraordinary way to help a friend get back on his or her feet.

Resource Guide: Recovering from Sandy
by American Red Cross

Comments

hometipster My heart and thoughts go out to all those affected by Sandy. This is not something I would want to experience and must be an extremely testing time for all involved.
7 months ago · ·
mcd53 I live in the Florida panhandle and have after 40 yrs ....always been prepared. Had plenty before so when Ivan came along and devastated NW florida we were as prepared as you can be. I even slept the nite through. We were prepared for no power for the next 6 wks. Now my husband is a home diaylisis patient . We still don't evacuate, we have this down to a science...of course anything can happen. But here you get prepared and stay prepared because we know it may be 20-25 yrs, or 2 yrs....but it will come again.. And after Ivan flattened us, I would like to thank again all the wonderful people that came from several states to help.
On day I was in my front yard trying to cut a pine into pieces. A man from Ohio pulled up whipped his chainsaw out and it was done in 10 minutes.
He gladly took the glass of tea refused any money, so as we talked a few more minutes I had my son slide $40.00 in his console with a thank you where he wouldn't miss it. He had gone above and beyond and I cried because he had cut them into perfect pieces that could be rolled to the curb easily....a 35 ft pine.
He deserved more for being a wonderful Christian (which he was) and I will never forget him.
7 months ago · ·
saknjak Great advice
7 months ago · ·
jeanettchka Thanks for this article. So many people want to help, but are unsure what to do or say! I will clip and save this for future reference.
7 months ago · ·
mcgrathinnola 1.AMEN 2.AMEN 3.AMEN 4.AMEN 5.AMEN 6.AMEN 7. AMEN !
7 months ago · ·
gloryosky Please remember these ideas when Florida gets hit again.
7 months ago · ·
lowesforelaine gift cards, gift cards, gift cards. people can use them immediately.
7 months ago · ·
hometipster One of our contributors submitted a number of guides on Hurricane preparation and these were well received. I have to say that will all the efforts that people make Sandy and the likes are not something I think anyone can fully prepare for.

From myself and all my colleagues and contributors at Hometipster.com our hearts and thoughts are with everyone in this most difficult time. Lives are the most important thing, other things can always be rebuilt and what is nice to see is the people coming together to help one another in a real time of need.
7 months ago · ·
Fine Art & Portraits by Laurel Alsion, you truly gleaned wisdom from your disaster. Thanks for sharing again.
7 months ago · ·
sdusl911 Our house was flooded 4 years ago with 4 1/2 ft of water. We camped, lived in friends homes while on vacation and kept our personal items in our cars like a moving closet. We showered at our gym. After three months we were provided a FEMA trailer 10 miles from our home. While most turned up their noses we were thrilled! Because we lived on a lower density, quiet street much of the help didn't come our way. I would like to find a family in a similar situation to help. We were out of our home for over a year and once back in and the flood was far from everyone's memories we were still plugging away trying to put things back to a new normal. There were many lonely days after we were back in our home still trying to put things right. After four years I'm finally feeling settled back in.

It's too early yet but if anyone knows of a family that my husband and I could mentor please let us know. We come with much experience but not a lot of money. For years to come there will be many decisions to be made , paper work to do and much hard work.

Susan. Sdual911@yahoo.com
7 months ago · ·
shmock Thanks! Very helpful for all emergencies!
7 months ago · ·
kftrujillo I would like to offer my home, but we know no one hurt by the disaster and live in the Midwest. Am I too far away to assist this way?
7 months ago · ·
gstmartin73 I live in Florida where hurricanes are a big threat. We bought a survival book and have set aside rations, tons of water, dog food, rain wear and on and on. The best way I can help is send monies to Red Cross and Pray.
7 months ago · ·
pamlearned Nice, very helpful piece. Thank you!
7 months ago · ·
olesmommy Excellent article, good suggestions. Thanks!
7 months ago · ·
Esprit Decor, LLC Wow, Alison, this really touched me! I live in the Caribbean where Hurricanes are part and parcel of "island living". Having made it through so many, yet effected by the damage it does to communities, families, jobs, etc., I understand the far-reaching impact it can have and the need to do something to help those in need. Never was I more aware of this when, 5 years ago next month, I was in Asheville, NC (my other home) working on the renovation of the entire house and our home in St. Thomas burned to the ground in under 10-minutes. My partner, and our 7 animals made it out alive but nothing else. My family's cherished family albums chronicling my parents youth and ours, were all taken in the fire - over 27 albums! It was what hurt the most after getting over the shock that my family was still alive and I was miles away. What happened next was nothing short of amazing: our entire community banded together and gave us shelter, clothing, meals, comfort, photos they shared with us and above all, money. It took two and a half years to get the insurance settlement and having just started the renovation on our home in NC, we were cash-strapped and with that house being completely gutted, we couldn't move there either. The fundraiser was also a fun-raiser for our spirits and we were able to buy the essentials to create a modest home again and rebuild our lives. It was remarkable and not a day goes by that we don't count our blessings, and top on the list above the replacement of our creature comforts, is the loving support and generosity of people - known and unknown - who came to our need and helped us believe in tomorrow.

Your article is not only beautifully written, but right on in every single account! Thank you for taking the time to share it with readers who want to know where to start and what to do. Great advice!
7 months ago · ·
benilung Hi everyone! I wish I live closer to States, to be able to give a hand to those who need in this days.I am a young constructer and I would be glad to help, but is so hard for me to get there from east Europe, but who knows...
May God bless all those who are in this bad situation.
7 months ago · ·
olldbobbi As a kid I went to summer camp in Toms River; I vacationed with my (late) grandmother in Seaside Heights; family outings were at Atlantic City and Asbury Park. The county I lived in was declared eligible for emergency unemployment funds by Gov. Christie. Living in California now is so hard because I still have an emotional attachment to all these places, as well as my old home, and I can't find any information about if or how well my old home survived Sandy. As a weird coincidence, my best friend from 1968 just went back there to visit her dad and she took pics of my old home for me! I guess at least I have that.

If anyone has any information about Port Reading, Woodbridge Township, Middlesex County that they'd be willing to share with me, I would so greatly appreciate it.
7 months ago · ·
Amanda Simons Great article. Our 4-H clubs traveled down to Mississippi when all those tornadoes hit last year and distributed supplies to communities along the way. We are trying to organize something like this again. I'm currently trying to contact some local extension offices in New York and New Jersey but have not had much luck. If anyone is involved in any 4-H groups in or near communities that were hard-hit, please let me know. I'd really like to collaborate with another extension office on this.

On a design note, I'm really impressed by whoever built that gazebo! It looks like you could probably just stand it right back up!
7 months ago · ·
lathcrew This is the best advice I have seen yet. I too have family in the Toms River area and thankfully they have lost none of their possessions and had minimal home damage. They know many that have suffered much worse in the last week. One other point I would like to make are some of the comments I see online. There are several Facebook sights, such as Jersey Shore Hurricane News, that are legitimately trying very hard to get accurate information out to the people that need it most. Some of the comments that people post are cruel and insensitive. I would advise everyone to practice some self editing prior to hitting the enter button.
7 months ago · ·
bekp Living in the Red River valley in ND, we've prepped for floods multiple times--though they tend to be the slow, inexorable kind and not rapid & wind-whipped.
The picture drive is a fabulous idea--the hardest thing to do is to rebuild the artifacts of your personal or family history. If you are family member outside of the affected area, start going through your negatives/digital files, and make reprints of wedding, baptisms, childhood photos, etc.
If you have an evac order--it's the four P's: People, pets, pills, & pictures. The rest can, eventually, be replaced.
Also with flooding, if you have to evacuate--if you have the 10 minutes--tie up all of your draperies, curtains, swags, etc. to the top of the rod, if you can. Then, even if you have water, you may have to replace floor coverings, but not all the window treatments. Sometimes it's just the small things--that there is something that you can save/restore from before the flood/storm that can make a huge difference.

Oddball fact--disposable diapers left in a cabinet during a flood will absorb so much water that the force of the expansion will break cabinet framing.
7 months ago · ·
mugsy1703 Wow, excellent suggestions! Our hearts and prayers go out to those who have been affected by Sandy and our heartfelt thanks go out to all those who are taking the time to help in any way they can.
7 months ago ·
gailratte A fantastic summary. So salient and to the point.
6 months ago ·
Positive Space Design I went to Sandys most devasted areas in Staten Island NY when they were not getting much attention or support from anyone. The victims I was lucky enough to meet have the most beautiful hearts and were overly thankful for what I was able to offer. If anyone has the opportunity to meet some of these beautiful people you should, it will brighten up not only your day but theirs as well.
6 months ago · ·
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